Birth that we call death
Below is a copy of an email letter I recently sent to a dear friend whose husband recently passed away:
Dear sister,
Life on Earth is good in many ways because of the joyful and loving relationships that are available to each of us during our time on Earth, and the best is yet to come—–after this life, because of the loving relationships that will become even more joyful, loving, and wonderful after this life for kind and loving people like your husband, who have shared their love and kindness with others and thus made a positive difference in the lives of many others.
I was in a serious car accident in November 2000, where I barely survived for almost two months in intensive care. The doctors almost decided to turn off the machines a couple of times that were keeping me alive at a cost of $10,000 a day—more than $500,000 in total—because they didn’t think there was much chance of me surviving anyway. Some nights, as I wondered whether I would wake up in this earthly life with loved ones here, or with my beloved mother, grandparents, and other loved ones on the heavenly side, I felt completely at peace; I knew that both places are filled with joyful, uplifting relationships with loved ones, if we choose them to be so. I felt an undeniable assurance within my inner spirit, like a gift of inner peace from our loving Heavenly Father, that life would still be good and joyful in either place, and that in some ways it would be even better if I departed for my heavenly home to be with my loved ones there. Because my children were at a stage in life where I felt they needed me, I prayed for more time on earth, and the necessary miracles came that kept me alive and gave me more time on earth.
There is absolutely no doubt in our inner minds and spirits that good and caring people will immediately enjoy very loving relationships in a more heavenly place after leaving this life. Let us all choose to live lives of sharing kindness and love with others, so that we may fully enjoy relationships in this life and so that we may be prepared to fully enjoy relationships in our future heavenly forever home with our loved ones there.
Below are some excellent quotes that I, Charles Hunt, love from my favorite book on the subject of death outside of Scripture, called “The Birth of That Which We Call Death” by Paul H. Dunn and Richard M. Eyre. I hope that reflecting on some of these quotes will bring you greater inner peace as you go through this difficult time. You can get the entire book and most of the other 50 books by New York Times bestselling authors Richard and Linda Eyre completely free online by visiting their website at eyresfreebooks.com. They offer their books for free online because they are far more interested in improving and blessing the lives of others than they are in making money. Richard and Linda Eyre have been two of my favorite writers for the past 40 years.
“Death? Translated into the language of heaven, that word means life.” Henry Ward Beecher
Seneca said: “The day we fear as the last is nothing more than the birthday of eternity.”
Rossiter W. Raymond said, “Life is eternal, love is immortal; death is only a horizon, and a horizon is nothing but the limit of our vision.”
On a beautiful blue lagoon, on a clear day, a handsome sailboat spreads its gleaming white sail in a cool morning breeze and sails out into the open sea. We watch it recede magnificently across the deep blue, and gradually, we see it diminishing in size as it approaches the horizon. Finally, where the sea and sky meet, it glides silently out of sight; and someone near me says, “She’s gone!” Where did she go? She’s out of sight, that’s all. She’s still as large in mast, hull, and sail, still just as capable of bearing her load. And we can be sure that, just as we say, “She’s gone!” someone else says, “He’s coming!”
Alexander Graham Bell said: “One door closes, another opens.”
Rabindranath Tagore said: “Death is not turning off the light; it is turning off the lamp because dawn has come.”
Benjamin Franklin wrote to his niece after the death of her brother (his stepfather): “It is the will of God and nature that these mortal bodies should be laid aside when the soul is to enter real life. This is rather an embryonic state, a preparation for life. A man is not fully born until he dies.”
Another unidentified author wrote: “Because it is pain that makes us reflect and pain that teaches us to feel.”
John Taylor said, “While we mourn the loss of our friend, others rejoice to find him behind the veil.”
Pain is a word closely related to love, and joy and pain are compatible feelings. Indeed, what is pain but a tender side of love?
The happiest, sweetest, and most tender homes are not those where there has been no sorrow, but those that have been overshadowed by sorrow and where the comfort of Christ has been accepted. The very memory of sorrow is a gentle blessing that hangs over the home, like the silence that comes after prayer. There is a blessing sent by God in every burden of sorrow.
The reason people are afraid of death is because they are afraid of the unknown.
Shakespeare said, “Be prepared for death—and death or life will be the sweeter.”
“The spirits of the righteous are exalted to a greater and more glorious work; therefore they are blessed in their departure to the spirit world. …. “They are not far from us, and they know and understand our thoughts, feelings, and movements, and are often distressed thereby.” Joseph Smith.
“The spirit has not changed a single particle of itself by leaving the body.” Heber C. Kimball.
“Behold, an angel hath made known unto me that the spirits of all men, as soon as they depart from this mortal frame, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or bad, are carried back unto that God who gave them life. And then it shall come to pass that the spirits of the righteous shall be received into a state of happiness which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, where they shall rest from all their troubles, from all care and sorrow.” (From The Book of Mormon, Alma, chapter 40, verses 11 and 12.)
“For death is but a passage from time to eternity.” William Penn.
Ben Franklin once said, “Our friend and we were invited to go abroad… His chair was ready first, and he went before us. We could not all conveniently start together; and why should you and I be sad about this, since we shall soon follow him, and know where to find him?”
Any prized possession, if parted with for a good purpose and returned to us in better condition, brings joy instead of agony and peace instead of frustration…
“Death hath passed upon all men, to accomplish the merciful plan of that great Creator…” (Book of Mormon, 2 Nephi chapter 9: verse 6).
“No pain that man or woman suffers on earth will be without its compensating effect… if it is borne with patience.” James E. Talmage
An unidentified author wrote: The pain lasted so long, that I said to him today, “I don’t want you with me any longer,” and I stopped there, surprised by the look on his face. “I, who have been your friend,” he said to me; “I, who have been your teacher, have taught you all you know about understanding love, sympathy, and patience. Shall I go?”
John Newton said, “Trials are medicines which our kind and wise physician prescribes because we need them; and he proportions the frequency and weight thereof to what the case requires. Let us trust his skill and be grateful for his prescription.”
Edwin Markham said, “Only the soul that knows great pain can know great ecstasy. Sorrows come to open spaces in the heart for joy.”
Thomas Fuller said, “There is no cross, there is no crown.”
Henry Ward Beecher said, “We are always at the forge, or at the anvil; through trials, God is forming us for higher things.”
We often want to say, “Yes, yes, I know, I know, but this pain or this sorrow is too great. I can’t grow from it because it’s more than I can bear.” Perhaps we are standing or sitting when we say this, instead of kneeling and asking God for the strength we lack.
Dr. William Hunter, an 18th-century physician, uttered these words in the final moments of his life: “Had I strength enough to hold a pen, I would write how easy and pleasant it is to die.”
As physically pleasurable as the moment of death may be, spiritually it is one of the most exciting and joyful moments of eternity. Like opening the door to a dark room from the inside, the dying person emerges into the light of the spiritual world, where friends and family will be waiting to welcome them.
Brigham Young said: “There is no period known to them (the dead) in which they experience so much joy as when they pass through the portals of death and enter into the glorious change of the spirit world.”
If we could glimpse, even for a moment, the glory and excitement a loved one faces when their eyes close to time and open to eternity; if we could only glimpse this, perhaps there would be more understanding in our pain and more joy in our sorrow.
Jean Paul Richter said: “Every friend who leaves is a magnet that draws us to the other world.”
The spiritual world is a place where those who did not have the opportunity to hear and accept the gospel (of Jesus Christ) on earth will have that opportunity, so that they may “be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.” (Bible, 1 Peter 4:6 and 1 Peter 3:18-20)
Joseph Fielding Smith said, “Old people will not look old when they come out of the grave. Scars will be removed. No one will be bent or wrinkled… all will have their bodies completely restored.”
“If we consider mortality as a complete existence, then pain, sadness, failure, and short life might be a calamity. But if we consider the whole of life as eternal, extending into the premortal past and into the eternal future after death, then all events can be put into proper perspective and fall into their proper place.” Spencer W. Kimball
In a certain way of thinking, it is not the deceased but the mourner who should concern us at the moment of death. The deceased is in the spirit world and in the care of their Father; but we, who are left behind, are left alone to decide for ourselves whether separation will teach us strength and faith or bitterness and despair. It is we who remain who need guidance, who must still work for our own salvation within and amidst the trials and experiences of mortality.
(Note from Charles Hunt) —- The truth that good family relationships and friendships will continue beyond our time on earth is a fact we can all prayerfully feel in our inner spirits. I hope some of these above quotes from the book, “The Birth We Call Death,” have encouraged you, as they have me each time I have reread that great book.
As mentioned above, you may want to read the full book on Richard and Linda Eyre’s website at: eyresfreebooks.com
For any parent or grandparent, some of the many other free books by Richard and Linda Eyre are incredibly helpful in helping to build more joyful relationships and a more joyful home environment for families. Other fantastic free books by the Eyres include “Teaching Children Joy,” “Teaching Children Responsibilities,” “Teaching Your Children Values,” “The Happy Family,” etc. I haven’t read anything by them that hasn’t been incredibly uplifting and helpful in building more joyful relationships. At least one of their books has appeared on The New York Times Bestseller list.
A cartoon showed two old women sitting on a cloud, with wings, and playing the harp. One says to the other, “Think about it. If we hadn’t taken all those health supplements, we might have gotten here five years earlier!”
Please know that we send these thoughts to you and that our prayers are with you, because we love you and hope that some of these thoughts will help bring you some inner peace.
With much love,
Charles and Amparo Hunt